Went to check out a local school last night. I was impressed to say the least. Here is a summary of what I learned:
Neither a hip throw nor a sweep require any type of set up. Furthermore, the proper technique is accompanied by a lot of hopping on one leg or spinning around with the other guy on your back.
Real Martial Artists can pluck your eyeball out of the socket and tear your testicles off.
The Ninja are related to the Shaolin Temple
In multiple attacker situations, everyone waits around for their turn at you
If someone attempts to stab you, grab their hand, you wont get cut.
In a knife situation, no one ever holds the knife out in front of them to slice you, they always use big telegraphed motions. Furthermore, this attack will come in one of two ways: Overhand or a straight thrust.
You don’t actually have to touch someone to become effective. Simply simulating the motion in the air is sufficient.
If someone doesn’t do it right the first time, screw ‘em. Let the next guy try. No use in helping them get it right.
A Phoenix eye fist is simply the index knuckle protruding. This is an effective weapon without any conditioning and will crush the side of someone’s head.
Tiger Claws also require no conditioning.
The teacher is to be revered as a god. Do not ask questions or doubt his word.
I can’t wait until next week. They are making weapons. I didn’t know a hooked sewing needle glued to a stick was so deadly.
I actually kept a straight face through the whole thing. The teacher asked me what I thought, I told him it was unique and interesting. I wanted to punk the guy SOOOOO BAAAAAD. But of course, he was from Gary and would have trounced me.
You may take my life, but you will never take my Freedom
