I need help learning how to relax and not be so tense, I’ve had a couple of intructors tell me that I need to relax a bit more but I just can’t seem to loosen up enough.
I think I try to force moves more than just do them…
Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. 
When you are practicing at home, try doing the forms like yoga or slow Tai Chi. Sounds funny, I know, but it works. Especially on forms that are flowing.
For more “hard” sets and forms sucha s Long Tiger Form, I do a little variation. I still slow it down, but rather than doing it Tai Chi style, I do them “with tention”. (No I’m not contradicting myself. 
) Do each stance or move slowly, powering through like you’re trying to force your body to move in tar. after you have completed the move pause for a few seconds befor beginning the next.
The reason these meathods seem to work, is familiarity. If you are very familiar with the movements, you will relax automaticlly, like how you sleep better in your own bed. Also gives you an excelent anaerobic workout. Good training for joints and muscles, too. You will find your endurance shoot up.
Great post by Becca.
One thing I would like to add, some people are better at relaxing than others.
I find that lots of people that need to rely on physical strength a lot tend to have a tougher time doing so.
Adding to what becca said about the slower forms, they allow you to analyse the movements and your own body better.
You will realise that some moves or sections of a move feel awkward, this could be due lack of “strength” and you muscling your way through to bad breathing habits.
Lastly relaxing is also mental, in one TJQ style it is said:
“What we relax is fear”
This can be achieved thrugh familarity as becca said or by becoming less self-conscious and worrying about what your form looks like to others.
Remember you only train for yourself not for others.
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Don’t try to copy 100% the movements of your sifu or elders in the kwoon. Theya re more experienced and their movements will be different and too hard for you to copy.
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Cheers.
Thanks heaps Becca, and Laughing Cow 
I’ll definately give those methods a try, breathing habits are one thing that I’m trying to work on too.
Thanks again, I appreciate the advice. 
Let us know how it is going.
Best of luck.
Originally posted by Laughing Cow
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Adding to what becca said about the slower forms, they allow you to analyse the movements and your own body better.
You will realise that some moves or sections of a move feel awkward, this could be due lack of “strength” and you muscling your way through to bad breathing habits.
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Can also be caused my lack of dexerity or agility.
ATAC, I noticed you have only been training a few months. MA movements are forien to western cultures. You may not realize it, but you might just be feeling “silly” doing the movements at first.
one thing i like to do is to flex the tense area pretty strongly for a few seconds, then just let it go. in wing chun, a lot of students tend to let their shoulders rise (tense traps, etc.), so i have them try to touch their shoulders to their ears, hold it, then just let their shoulders drop. i then tell them that where their shoulders dropped to is where their shoulders should remain the whole time – no lifting or raising.
it’s similar in idea to stretching your arms to the side and back when your back is tense – flex them, let them get some blood, and then let them fully release.
i really dont do forms, but i have always been a big advocate of practicing and moving very slowly. you’ll be suprised when you see increases in speed and power as well (mainly due to being more relaxed and learning to get your whole body working as a unit).
also hit the bag alot. when your done go ahead and hit the bag some more. keep your arms entirely relaxed until the moment of impact. really focus on making the rest of your body do the work behind the punch … feel the power coming from the ground (like you’re pushing off your back foot) … go through your hips and spine and just let your hands float out to the target and snap at the last second. you’ll be supprised how much harder your hitting when you get it down right. its also good to make sure your target is as small as possible … a pin point on the bag … and that your focusing on hitting several feet behind that pin point.
… you might already know that last bit about striking but i just thought id add it anyway.
big thing is that when you feel more power from letting your hands float to where they need to go you’ll have more confidence in being relaxed in all aspects of the art.
also be patient … it does take time and progress can be slow. i just found that actually seeing more power from relaxation helps to break the mindset of musceling through sh it a little better.
I agree with rubthebuddha and the others in regards to the tension/relaxation exercises… If you have a problem with tension you first need to be aware of what tension is before your body can understand relaxation.
Pay attention to your breathing… most people stop breathing normally when tense. Focus on your exhalation.
Are there specific areas during your workout where you feel more tense than others? For instance, are you more tense during forms (if you do forms) or during sparring? Or perhaps both?
If you are tense doing forms, perhaps it’s because of your mental imagery? Some people think “I need to show a lot of power” or what not when doing forms and it gets translated to your body as “be TENSE”. So, by changing your mental image from “power” to “speed” or “fluid” may help you a lot in overcoming tension in this area.
If for instance you are having problems with tension during sparring you could use a partner exercise such as “slow-sparring”. Start working at a real slow speed (read: slow-motion) and concentrate on keeping your body relaxed, biomechanically correct/efficient and last but not least BREATH! Be fluid in your movements and stay consistant with the speed of your movements. Move your body just enough to get away from your partner’s strikes. Roll them off, slip, parry or whatever, but don’t use jerky movements. And don’t think too much about how to block, just keep in constant motion (don’t stall), evade and strike back when you see a opening. Again, GO SLOW and remember to BREATH!
BTW, moving slowly doesn’t mean you can change the physics of a strike. Once the strike is deployed make sure it stays in that force vector, i.e. don’t track your opponent. For instance, if you throw a right straight punch and you see your opponent move to your left, don’t all of a sudden change trajectory… finish your movement. You get the idea.
The idea of this drill is to get you relaxed and reduce your fear-reactivity (cause I bet that’s part of your tension problem). You’d be amazed at how difficult this is at first. BTW, these principles can also be used when grappling.
There are other drills which help different areas of relaxation, but I won’t bore everybody here. The above are just a couple of ideas I currently use in my own training and also when I teach others.
KG
One another thing, sort of inline with the mental imagery thing. Try to ‘smile’ during your training. Some teachers frown on this and if that’s the case just try this at home. When sparring, doing forms, working on the heavy bag just keep smiling. It’s mighty tough to tense when you’re smiling.
KG
Concentrate on breathing deeply from the hara/tanden/tantien/couple of fingers’ width below and in from the navel. Preferably have someone teach you. Do it while washing up, lying down, making love, walking, sparring, doing forms… whatever.
It works.
Oh and Kempo guy’s advice about laughing/smiling often works too! But if you do it too often your gonna be fighting goons with syringes trying to dress you in a very long-sleeved white jacket…!
My old sifu used to say when working applications, move like you have a fever of 105.