If GDA were a child advocate, he’d probably be in jail after a week in the job, after savagely beating some bad parents.
Probably.
Two points:
-I never thought I’d hear the members of KFO recommend GDA for child advocacy.
and…
-Out here, this has been all over the news for a while, and a lot of people were really questioning how the husband could have lived with her and not seen all the warning signs. Apparently, the lady was going nuts before the last pregnancy, but nothing was done. Since moving out here, I’ve met a lot of people whose only goal in life was to have a lot of children, and a lot of guys whose only goal was to have a big family, but no intention of really doing anything for that family except working. Not exonerating her, but pointing out that she was probably batty before this, but the one person who saw her day in and day out didn’t seem notice much going on.
ryu and jas … actually i hadn’t considered it. and now that you mention it i think sharky’s right. man i can’t even handle hearing about this kinda stuff. i seriously want to track this lady down if she is released. i guarantee im not the only one. sad thing is that after murdering small children and babies she will likely have earned protection from the state if she ever is released. if i were subjected to abuse stories day in and day out by a little kid, and then met the abusive parent .. .
man i hope there would be somone there to pull me off in a situation like that cause they wouldn’t fu ck around with me if i went to jail for killing someone. see that’s fu cked up too. this lady kills her children and has a chance at ultimately walking away. i rid the world of filth and i’d likely get at least three quarters of max sentence. meanwhile some dumb ass hippy gets arrested for selling acid at a hippy fest and he’ll serve more time than the both of us. justice isn’t blind it’s fu cking stupid.
i dunno. it would be nice to help kids out .. . i just wonder how i would handle seeing their parents after knowing exactly what goes on. if i combined my curent job with this idea i could help kids deal with the frustrations of trying to show their parents how to use the computer.
kc elbows brings up two good points.
lol .. i’d be the picture perfect roll model wouldnt i. christ, poor kids would probably get it worse after spending time with me.
GDA
If she walks you can stay at my place. Houston is 2.5 hours away. We can ride together.
Yates’ husband is pretty whipped. If my wife killed our child…
Either that or he is a very compasionate fellow to stand by her after all that.
GDA,
To me, it sounds like you care too much to be a good child advocate. Not in any way meaning to discourage you, just saying that the craziness of it would be hard for you not to act against.
For a time, I was really passionate about being a psychologist, studied all the works of the founders of psychology, read a lot of theory. Then I actually met a crazy person. I can’t deal with that kind of suffering.
My sister is a doctor. She trains a lot of doctors every year, and she says two types generally(not always) make bad doctors:
- Doctor’s who don’t care at all
and
- Doctors who care too much
…and she says the first sometimes make great doctors, if they care about the things they do as doctors, but not the people. Then, a patient not getting well is an affront to their expertise as a doctor.
“justice isn’t blind it’s fu cking stupid”
Do something about it then. Simply complaining won’t change anything.
I know what you mean though. I gave long consideration to being a police officer in my life, and went so far as to join an academy, etc. I decided that I too possible “cared too much” to be a police officer. Some of you guys joke around and say they’re jerks, etc. But they have to see the worst parts of humanity everyday all the time… 
Suicide is the highest among them I think in career profession, or one of the highest. Divorce is high, etc.
The one time I couldn’t protect someone or had to see a headless child in a car accident…how would I deal with it?
On the flip side, GDA, if you can channel your anger into extremely passionate and usable energy, you might be able to do very good things for kids. Just a thought.
Ryu
I agree with Ryu.
OT, but last I heard, EMT’s had the highest suicide rates.
I condidered cop when I was younger, but I couldn’t do it. Not the suffering, I had to attend an autopsy once(for a class), and that stuff doesn’t phase me, but I have seen plenty of things in this area that stink of dirty cop to me, and I could never stand for that, which would give me a very short life span as a cop.
I think that the husband is compassionate, not weak in this sense, but I bet he’s looking back at all the warning signs going “How could I not see this coming?”
What drives me crazy is that most of the time, people do these terrible crimes, and there was all the warning in the world. A couple of years back, this guy kidnapped a little girl here, but he was seen doing it. EVERYONE was looking for his truck, two days later they caught him, but the girl had been killed by this church. Anyway, someone who knew the guy came forward and said that he had told them once that he was going to kidnap a girl, had the girl picked out, etc. I though “Whay aren’t you in jail for not telling anyone til now?” but the guy apparently faces no repercussions for ignoring the obvious, and the girl’s family pays all the price.
Must leave dreary thread.
Ok, maybe not a child advocate. How about a mentor? Maybe be a ‘big brother’ volunteer at the local Boys & Girls club?
My folks divorced when I was 10. During the next 6 years, I really needed somebody, anybody, to be a stable adult figure in my life - stable meaning there for me without their own agenda and hystrionics taking center stage. There was none, so I got into a LOT of trouble, and wasted a great deal of my young adult years doing heavy drugs and alcohol because of my poor self-image. I sure could have used an ear, GDA. Maybe you could be that ear for someone now?
It’s really refreshing to see someone go through that type of life, and make a complete turnaround, Jas.
Very admirable indeed.
KC, EMT sounds right actually, but I think cops are following close behind in there someone. They have high suicide rates too.
Actually this thread is not that dreary I don’t think. It’s amazing how we can still see the important goodness in the world even through disgust and evil actions.
Ryu
GDA- I agree with you man!
Maybe it’s time the good people of America got together to petition or whatever to change some of the BS laws.Not sit around & gripe about it.
Get to know your police. Talk to your Senators.
Do what you can.
GDA is already doing the best service to children.
PARENTING IS THE GREATEST RESPONSIBILITY IN THE WORLD.Period.
Badger
GDA - quote:
Dwid: “Anyway, this doesn’t even address the inhumanity of doing research on someone after accepting the premise that it was their biology that predisposed them to being a killer in the first place. It makes society worse than the killer, as society is then callously and calculatedly doing what only a genetic mistake caused the killer to do.”
GDA: “FU CK THAT. what the fu ck are you thinking man??? that ****ing cu nt killed 5 children. 5 . … children. what the fu ck. genetic mistake my fu cking ass. the only mistake was that someone didn’t take the crazy b1tch out before she killed her children.”
Dwid: I totally understand where you’re coming from, and I must reiterate that I have a tendency to want to see the death penalty in a case like this myself. In the quote you used, I was simply stating the contradiction in advocating experimentation on psychotics on the basis that their brain chemistry or whatever is different from ours. One of the problems I have with mainstream psychology is the tendency to remove responsibility from the hands of those that do terrible things.
ewallace . .. i’m there. don’t leave the forums anytime soon.
dwid .. . cool .. i hear where you’re comming from and that makes sense. sorry if i came off to strong, i just gets all emotional when childens or manimals is concerned.
badger is correct. no bigger responsibility to children than parenting them.
kcelbows . . man, i dunno even know what to make of the fact that the husband isn’t the one screaming for the death penelty the loudest.
ryu . .
“Simply complaining won’t change anything.” heard. no way i can argue with that. but i often to feel like a very small animal in a very very big wood - piglet.
jas …
you and i arent that far removed in our childhood experiences. my parents were divorced when i was seven and i was left to live with nancey. she’s definately the crazy b1tch i spurt out of, but she’s no mother to me. the woman is a complete lunitic and a malicious ****. i have tried to give her the benifit of the doubt because she’s crazy, but she knows what’s going on and what she’s doing, she just justifys her actions in a chaotic mess of sentences you can rarely make sense of. so at the mature age of 7 i had to raise my self. had to cook if i wanted to eat, do laundry if i wanted my clothes clean (i actually did laundry more than i would have given a 7 year old credit for, but yeah, most of the time i just wore my clothes dirty), get myself to school if i wanted to go, etc. no, i never really showed up for shcool more than a day or two a week. that stuff kinda sucked, but with absolute responsibility came absolute freedom which was really friggen cool. i came and went as i pleased and enjoyed every minute of it. lots of running around the streets at 3 in the morning, dodging the cops, prentending to be a ninja. odly enough, i never really got into major trouble. i was suspened a couple times every year from school, did allot of vandalizing (never got caught for that though), but never ended up in a home or anything. i was in the back of a cop car a couple times but only for exploring abandoned buildings and/or curfew violations. sad thing is that i kept telling the courts that i wanted to live with my father (in spite of all the fun i was having) but i guess my mother had a **** good lawyer. my mother actually showed up drunk as sh1t to a couple court hearings, saying more off the wall sh1t than usual, and they still insisted i couldn’t choose where i wanted to live until i was 13. my father kept fighitng it so i spent allot of time in court for 7 years, as i didn’t actually get to move in with him until i was 14. then the poor ******* died on me a year later. luckily i didn’t have to go back with my mother though as my older sister and her husband took me in.
the point of this long winded portion of my life history is that i did go through quite a few social workers during this time. none of them were worth a da mn. my mother would call up places saying that i was a problem child and need to speak with a psychiatrist as i was mentally unstable. every single one openly admitted that my mother was the problem within just a few meetings. the big brother types i had would make fun of her with me as much as any of my friends would. yet nothing was ever done. they kept making me go twice a week to play checkers or would assign me a new big brother dude to take me to the park. all the while they should have had my mother committed. the one time someone went off on her she stormed out and demanded i see another counsilor . .. and they fu cking honored it. maybe the system does need more people like myself in it. there is no way i would have let that go on. i mean i was completely open with all of my councilors … i told them about climbing the tops of bridges, eploring abandoned mines/buildings, running around all night long, jumping off bridges . … i was a dumb kid and proud of that stuff. and they all knew i wouldnt even think of doing that sh!t with my dad. yet every week i would go to play checkers and not one of them made an effort to get me out of that situation. maybe they didn’t believe me or tried where i couldn’t see . .. i dunno . . but i would have made it to the custody hearings.
i had allot of fun and wouldn’t trade my past as it definately made me who i am, but i’m lucky i aint dead. i wonder how many 7 year old kids are out running around in the middle of the night doing stupid sh1t just becasue they have no fear and are being ignored by incompitant parents and the system. you guys actually got me thinking now, but i still worry about the point kcelbows brought up about caring too much. not being physically abused i could hold back from beating a lady like my mother to death, but if some little girl came and told me she’d been raped by her father, this little dude would be paying her father a visit.
Oh dam n, I hear you.
I think you are a lot more capable of exercizing control over your rage than you give yourself credit for. And I think that if you pursued this mentoring/big bro thing for real, you will find that there are a lot of tools and knowledge available to help you.
Think about this - what if the little girl is raped and she has NO ONE to tell, no one to care? Maybe she grows up crazy from the pain like your momma, and turns into a psycho abuser with HER child, and the cycle goes on and on…
I think you would be an awesome mentor - you been there and done that, and kids can always tell the difference between a bullsh*t dogooder and the real deal. They can smell a phoney a mile away - you and I both did, didn’t we?
I went through a few social workers - none of them were worth da mn
If you could handle the temptation to smack some gruggie whacked-out child abusing father, I think you’d make a good Social Worker GDA.
Jas - That’s pretty hard sh!t - how’d you turn out so good?
As for the small animal in the big wood - join an organisation. You realise that a lot of small animals make a lot of noise - whatever the cause.
GDA,
I kind of regret saying that. If that is something you could be passionate about, it sounds like you already know the pitfalls(being powerless to the beaurocracy of it, etc.), and maybe you could do some good and manage not to strangle anyone. Also, I suspect there are more angles to it: child advocate, big brother(one that bad mommies and daddies would be scared to death of), even organizational stuff, not necessarily directly dealing with the kids and parents.
My wife works at a school district teaching behavioral disordered kids. I think I’ve met a few different versions of the young version of you through her. My favorite is Ben, his parents used to get out of prison long enough to get custody of him from his grandmother, take him home, drink, get in fights, treat him badly, and end up back in prison. He used to come over and ask me all kinds of kung fu questions: he wasn’t getting beaten, but he wasn’t getting anything from these people, the so-called parents. He just liked being a part of my kung fu and my step sons computer stuff. Anyway, the grandmother now has actual custody, and he’s doing well.
“Maybe she grows up crazy from the pain like your momma”
lmao. nothing will make laugh harder than that all day.
your right about being able to sniff out someone who’s really had it rough. hell, you still can. not as well a a kid, but you can tell when some prissy little rich kid is trying to act like he’s had it bad.
Well now. I didn’t mean to imply that your mom was raped as a child and that’s why she’s a nutso. What I meant is that that kind of pain can make you that level of crazy. I could have worded it better 
I’m not trying to push you into anything, buddy. I just see tremendous passion coming from you on the subject of child welfare, and passion like that for ANYTHING is a rare and wonderful thing in this world. It’s that kind of passion that makes a difference in people’s lives, that makes change happen. I just want to encourage you to rise above and use this gift. You have what it takes to be a real hero, GDA, to make a difference. That is worth encouraging.
kc elbows . .. legit concern dude. i said the same thing myself.
jas . . you couldn’t have worded it better.