Originally posted by ShaolinTiger00
[B]David, if you don’t mind, Could you elaborate a little bit upon your personal relationship with sifu? You mention is was “complicated”.
Btw, I think there is something to be said about traditional kung fu here. - fighting’s ultimate level is killing each other. It’s one thing to batter each other in a ring, or your kwoon. It’s one thing to defend your life from an attack.
But when you are the predator and kungfu is the vehicle for this.
You have crossed into another world. [/B]
I thought I already got a little into what made us conflicted.
We worked our azzes off to learn with him. We put up with his personality, often his abuse. I paid off his gambling debts more than once. I shuttled him around the country, paying his entire way. I translated for him. I ran his group classes.
We felt that in return, Chan Tai San tarnished both his image and the meaning of being a senior. By teaching crap to the “outsiders” there were people walking around talking about how Chan Tai San only taught worthless made up fluff. By “adopting” people in late night cash sessions, he cheapened our legit adoptions. To this day, you still have people walking around (and posting on BBS) telling you that Sifu Chan knew nothing…
Also, if you think I have a bad temper, you never knew Sifu Chan. He had a horrible temper, and when it was in effect, he lost all rational thought.
Here’s something I’ll share with you. Lilly Lau has a letter from my sifu denouncing me. Much has been made of this letter, except that I was with my sifu less that two days after it was written, and remained with him for another 8 years or so until he passed. Nor do people know WHY the letter was written…
My sifu knew Lau Fat Man. He knew Lilly since she was a child. So they were close almost like family. I didn’t have any problem with that. I had problems with her behavior, particularly during the funerral of my Si-Mo (my teacher’s wife)
I was VERY CLOSE with my si-mo. So was my then wife (now ex-wife). We were very upset with her passing. It was a coincidence, but Lilly Lau was in town at the time. My sifu took her out to tea, despite the funneral arrangements, and this was standard and not bad…
But at tea, Lilly Lau started doing stuff that pizzed me off. Lilly was just building her school and her federation at the time. She didn’t speak of it while my sifu was at the table. But when he got up to go to the bathroom, she handed out her card to all the senior students. She said she could quickly teach them some basic sets and make them members of her new association. As soon as Sifu Chan returned to the table… she stopped
I found this very low class… but it got worse
At a Chinese funneral, the family sits by the casket and thanks every visitor who attends. You MUST be sitting there ALL DAY. And you MUST thank all who come to pay respects.
Lilly Lau, acting like a teenage girl, not a respected adult teacher in teh Mo Lum, pulled my sifu outside to talk to him. Thus, when several well known NYC area sifu arrived to pay respects, my sifu, the HUSBAND, was not there to thank them…
I went and got Sifu Chan, I pulled him back to the casket and made sure he did the right thing. I then told Lilly Lau that she needed to act the correct way. She instead threatened to use her power to have me kicked out of the NACMAF federation (ie Sifu Tai Yim’s federation)
At this point, I told her that if she was a man, she’d have to put her hands up, but being that she wasn’t, the seniors KICKED HER OUT OF THE FUNNERAL
My teacher lost his mind! I was the seniro most present (Steve Ventura was in Florida) so I took responsibility. I did so not only because that was what the tradition was (as the senior most in the group present) but because it was the RIGHT THING TO DO…
I also called Sifu Tai Yim and told him that if he wanted to kick me out of the federation on Lilly Lau’s word, so be it. He just laughed and said it was HIS federation, NOT hers!
My sifu gave Lilly Lau the letter, because he was angry. But the letter never changed the fact of who I was, nor the fact that Lilly Lau acted totally low class at the funneral of my Si-Mo…
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