I just finished the DVD of Seven Swords
Otherwise known as the super-angst friends VS. the evil goths…
It seems to clock in at about 2.5 hours or 150 minutes. A far cry from four hours but still not a walk in the park. Especially since the entire film is in Mandarin - a language that (though I am more versant than the average white North American) I am FAR from fluent in. There were subtitles… In Chinese. Considering my vast knowlege of about 50 characters this was not particularly helpful. 
Picture if you will watching Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers Special Edition, having never read the book and never seen the theatrical release, in a language where you understand one word in twenty and about one complete sentence in a hundred.
That being said I really liked this film. The action was entertaining, the plot seemed straightforward enough (though I am a little bit confused about the wavy sword that was dug up by the bad-guy and then NEVER USED) from my limited grasp of dialogue and rapt attention to on-screen action. The bottle of sub-standard (expensive by Chinese standards) Cabarnet may have helped matters somewhat. 
The film quality seemed just fine in my opinion. I rarely had difficulty discerning who was speaking, just what the h311 they were saying.
:eek:
It did remind me considerably of another movie. It was the first movie I watched on TV after coming to China. Aside from DVDs I rarely watch TV. I am not overly fond of Chinese television; their
innovative
programming was not the reason I decided to come here. However occasionaly I will put on the CCTV movie channel. It was there I saw Kung Fu Mahjong (two hours of my life I will never reclaim) and this other movie. It featured a one-armed fighter, armed with a cleaver on a length of chain who spun (yes, spun) his way through an army of Goths and Road Warrior rejects until he had a rather exciting final battle with a guy whose Dao had about a million and one special features. Don’t suppose anyone knows what this movie was called per-chance…
Anyway, back to Seven Swords…
I mentioned earlier LoTR: Two Towers, SE. This was for a reason. It was of comparable length to the Two Towers SE. Like Two Towers it was comprised of long dramatic scenes punctuated by often extended periods of rather graphic violence. It was a fantasy plot that centered around a battle of good vs. evil that was (yes) slightly murkier than Rohirrim vs. Orcs but still relatively well delineated by prop, costume and character behaviour (Stoic good guys vs. overly emotional and perverse villians). Oh yeah and at one point the (mostly) helpless townfolk hid in an extensive system of caves while the warriors did battle.
Now just a few questions that perhaps Gene can answer…
1: What was with the sword that the villain dug up and then didn’t bother to ever ues in battle?
2: Why, oh why, did Donnie Yen’s character decide to go smash the statue and why in the world did he feel it was necessary to bring his damaged-goods girlfriend?
3: Where can I get a copy of that sword that doubles as a tree-felling axe and a baseball bat. 
4: Will an english-subtitled version ever be available here in the Middle Kingdom or will I just have to learn more Po Tong Hua to make sense of the dialogue in this movie?

Ratings:
Cinematography: 7/10
Action: 8/10
Plot: Um… Ask somebody who speaks Chinese.
Music: 3/10 (The la la la on the DVD menu drove me around the twist!!!)
Overall 7/10
Land Sun Cabarnet: Approx 35 RMB per bottle at Kaixingyu Supermarket, second most expensive Wine available. 3/10