OT: Got beaten profusely in China today

Martial Media, Culture and Other Arts Off Topic
1

Been working out a lot, and hiking around the nearby mountains, to offset the pain, I’ve been getting massage by a traditional chinese doctor, moxibustion(baowuguan?), the works.

Years of floor sanding left me with a good amount of shoulder problems, so he’s been focusing on this.

Now, I’ve gotten massages before, and no one else has been so good at figuring out just where I really have problems, they always tend to spot the other areas that are tense to compensate for the problems.

For those who haven’t had such a massage, it’s brutal. Sure, the areas that really hurt when they work on 'em they lay off of, but it’s just a trick, they’ll be back to that area, again and again. The whole time, their demeanor is pleasant, but again, it’s just a trick, by the time you realize this, it’s too late to escape.

Afterwords, they do the moxibustion, and you have to just lay there for a while. This is the traditional doctor’s way of telling you that you are their biotch. The worst part is knowing that, while it cost me $2 US, in America I’d have to pay through the nose to find out if the traditional doctor was anywhere near as good.

2

Heh, heh. My Hsing-I instructor and his wife have given me tui na treatments where I was wondering how much pain the human brain can register without passing out… :smiley: It’s hard to tell if one feels so good afterwards because they worked out the problems in the muscles and tissues, or if it’s just the relief of not being in such agony any more… :stuck_out_tongue:

3

I could make some NSFW comments about getting “beaten” by a masseuse… :smiley:

4

I think the main way you can tell if your traditional chinese doctor is good is if you experience Stockholm syndrome. If you don’t, he’s a quack for sure.

5

[QUOTE=SimonM;866338]I could make some NSFW comments about getting “beaten” by a masseuse… :D[/QUOTE]

You need to brush up on your Chinese culture, if they offer massage, they may also provide medicine, if they offer a “massagee” you will need medicine.

6

Massage or massagie aside I’m not the one who used beaten, massage and China in the same statement. :wink:

And I’ve been to hotels in China where I have gotten the ubiquitous 3 am phone call offering massagie. I had the good grace to say no and give the caller a brief but informative lesson in English explicatives.

7

[QUOTE=SimonM;866345]Massage or massagie aside I’m not the one who used beaten, massage and China in the same statement. :wink:

And I’ve been to hotels in China where I have gotten the ubiquitous 3 am phone call offering massagie. I had the good grace to say no and give the caller a brief but informative lesson in English explicatives.[/QUOTE]

I’ve always wondered what they would do if you had them come up and insisted on a traditional massage.

8

Considering the malnourished poor waifs that end up in the Chinese sex trade they would probably despair if that were to be requested.

9

The worst part of those 3 AM calls is that I am generally only in the larger cities when I first arrive in China, so I’m desparately trying to get on China time sleepwise, and it totally wakes me up and makes me ****ed off/depressed that people have to do that for a living. Then I get all tense, and could use a massage, without all the inconvenient diseases.

Rad a book some time back called China Candid, really interesting read, the interviewer talked to a wide variety of mainlanders, and bassically wrote his own part out of the chapters, so it’s just their voices. There’s a chapter where he interviews a hooker, it is hilarious. The last chapter is an interview with a Chinese executioner, it is somewhat creepy that he seems to be one of the most educated people in the book, and not devoid of morality. One favorite was the chapter of a military man who uses the base to open a hotel, and charges guests to shoot cannons on the naval ship on the nearby waters.

10

good tui-na is like beating your head against a wall;
-it feels good whan it stops.:wink:

11

[QUOTE=TenTigers;866373]good tui-na is like beating your head against a wall;
-it feels good whan it stops.;)[/QUOTE]

Most of the time, this is true for me, but my shoulder problem really feels better during, which is weird, cause I’ve had it for twenty years nonstop.

A friend of mine went with me one day, she’s really ticklish, and she’s like “I’m worried I’ll laugh too much to benefit from it.”

She did not laugh, but if she had, I was never going to fight her, but possibly date her.

12

Hard Tui-na massage is Bad Tui-na Massage

Ive had Tui-na Treatments that bruised and injured my muscle tissue leaving me worse than when i started. I am an LMT now and i have had some experience in this realm and i gotta tell ya, If i got you on the table i wouldnt be as brutal and you wouldnt feel like you got beaten profusely. Massage doesnt have to hurt in order to be effective. You dont have to FORCE the muscle tissue to release tension. Some modalities can be uncomfortable at times but not to the degree that KC elbows is talking about. I say you are getting scammed. Im sure it feels good after you get a treatment like that and why not, it feels good because the person stopped what they were doing. The vietnamese have a real f’ed up technique where they use coins and push them hard onto your muscle tissue leaving bruises. Had one of my Female Thai clients come in the other day and it freaked me out. I told her never to do that again, i worked on her a few sessions of what i do. she is fine and bruise and pain free.

                                                                   Peace,TWS
13

  1. He has never left bruises

  2. The reason I like the massage is not because I feel better after, but because he specifically hones in on problem areas without me having to tell them where they are, and they respond favorably during, not after.

14

[QUOTE=KC Elbows;866377]1) SHe has never left bruises, only bite marks

  1. The reason I like the massage is tug after the rub !.[/QUOTE]

Fixed that for you.

15

[QUOTE=sanjuro_ronin;866380]Fixed that for you.[/QUOTE]

Thanks, man. I was getting tired of making up all that stuff about a shoulder problem.

Does anyone know a good ointment to deal with “tui-na rash”?

16

For the record, no matter how many chinese citizens think so, the best cure of the stomach problems related to getting used to the microorganisms in the food in some chinese cities is not baijiu and spicy food.

Additionally, never tell a chinese person you have diarrhea. If you do, here is the conversation you will hear, until some unknown future date in which they forgot you ever had diarrhea:

Mr. Chun: This is my American friend, Li Ming.

Mr. Wang: Hello Li Ming, do you want a beer?

Mr. Chun: He can’t, he has diarrhea.

Mr. Wang: He has diarrhea?

Mr. Chun: Correct, he has diarrhea.

Mr. Chun’s girlfriend, who Mrs. Chun probably knows about: He has diarrhea? He shouldn’t drink beer.

Mr. Wang: Yes, Li Ming, you shouldn’t have beer, beer is not good for your diarrhea.

Mr. Zhao: Baijiu will help his diarrhea.

Mr. Chun’s girlfriend: You should eat bread, since you have diarrhea.

The waitresses among themselves: The American has diarrhea.

Twenty minutes will pass in which you secretly pray no one will say diarrhea again.

Mr. Chun(noting your discomfort): Diarrhea?

17

[QUOTE=KC Elbows;866388]For the record, no matter how many chinese citizens think so, the best cure of the stomach problems related to getting used to the microorganisms in the food in some chinese cities is not baijiu and spicy food.

Additionally, never tell a chinese person you have diarrhea. If you do, here is the conversation you will hear, until some unknown future date in which they forgot you ever had diarrhea:

Mr. Chun: This is my American friend, Li Ming.

Mr. Wang: Hello Li Ming, do you want a beer?

Mr. Chun: He can’t, he has diarrhea.

Mr. Wang: He has diarrhea?

Mr. Chun: Correct, he has diarrhea.

Mr. Chun’s girlfriend, who Mrs. Chun probably knows about: He has diarrhea? He shouldn’t drink beer.

Mr. Wang: Yes, Li Ming, you shouldn’t have beer, beer is not good for your diarrhea.

Mr. Zhao: Baijiu will help his diarrhea.

Mr. Chun’s girlfriend: You should eat bread, since you have diarrhea.

The waitresses among themselves: The American has diarrhea.

Twenty minutes will pass in which you secretly pray no one will say diarrhea again.

Mr. Chun(noting your discomfort): Diarrhea?[/QUOTE]

Was the diarrhea explosive?

18

[QUOTE=sanjuro_ronin;866391]Was the diarrhea explosive?[/QUOTE]

You are a b@stard.

19

Dude, consider yourself lucky. someone who knows tui nah is one thing, someone who is proficient and understands it implicitly is practically a treasure.

swiss massage, hot stones, deep tissue etc = Bullshit compared to bonafide tui nah.

and that goes for the rest of your too!

did you get the super heated muscles before the massage followed by jow?

man, that is sweet for colds in the muscles and when the fascia is all bumpy (knots)

20

Reference the “Hard Tui Na is bad Tui Na” comment, I’ve never had any injuries or bruises after the Tui Na I’ve received from my instructor, regardless of how painlful it was at the time.

The Tui Na I’ve received has alway been VERY deep-tisue and VERY intense, and (often) VERY painful, but NEVER injurious. In fact, whenever I’ve received it for treating injuries I’ve had due to training or fighting, the injuries have always healed in record time…