that’s really not the right idea when it comes to sparring. if you are worried about losing or looking bad while sparring, you will never reach your full potential. sparring is merely a learning tool - an avenue to teach you to apply your skills. you learn by using that time to work what you have learned. If you focus on winning, you will eventually stagnate because you will be too focused on winning and you will use the tools that you know you can use, as opposed to branching out and trying new techniques/strategies. getting hit happens. in judo, there is a female brown belt who has thrown me a few times - no biggie - we’re just practicing. We have a girl in thai boxing. it’s rare that she hits me, but she has on occasion. Oh well. This is why I say that activities such as regular sparring keep an ego in check.
It’s not the winning or losing in sparring. It’s the bad habits, the bad muscle memory you train in holding back.
Also, I know it’s not PC, but you can also train the girl to have the wrong attitude. Maybe she does OK with your light sparring, maybe she throws you. She might stomp on the wrong guys toes, kick the wrong guy thinking she can defend herself and just **** off the rapist even more.
I know this begs the question, “well, what should she do?” I don’t know. I didn’t design the female body. When all else fails you have to fight. But a girl would do better to try escape.
Fueiling their ego that they can fight a man is dangerous. If you’re an instructor, always holding back can be dangerous too.
sure but endomorphic doesn’t mean you’re fat , it just means you’re heavier then the average for your body type. An Endomorph who is in good shape doesn’t look fat in my opinion.
The other problem is “Endomorph” is sort of like “Rubinesque” in my book. Too many people use it as an excuse for carrying a little extra weight around. I had a freind who was a true endomorph, built like the proverbial brick sh!thouse, from head on he was practically square - but he took his shirt off and you saw the sixpack.
fueling the ego is one thing. pure skill is another. I didn’t realize my typo - she’s a black belt… been doing judo in germany since she was 8. She’s genuinely that good. I’ve seen her throw several guys.
As far as “training to hold back” in the thai class, we rotate partners when we spar. in 10 rounds of sparring, one to two rounds of lighter contact will NOT be detrimental to my skill by any means. And she doesn’t have to hold back on me.
the typical endomorph, IME is not well defined, unless he’s in absolutely great shape - they by default look chubbier than say, a mesomorph would.
I’m with 7 on this. I think going light can be of some good, it helps you with control.
Good point. I should have said that they are in better health, fitter, have less chance of heart-related disease etc.
Maybe it is because I am someone who has always carried a bit of extra weight (even when I was playing sports at a pretty high level I had a spare tyre), but I think society in general has a bad attitude towards people who do not have a trim or athletic body shape. Sure obesity is a problem, but if you are carrying a bit of extra weight it is not as bad as everyone seems to make out.
the original poster should tell his friend to punch every fat girl shes sees and see how long it takes her to get beat up.
It also enables you to recycle your training partners.
If ya go full blast all the time you’ll run out of peeps to train with fast an dthe time between sessions will be longer due to healing periods.
Better to spar to improve as opposed to compete. Save aggression and competition for when there is money involved, or honour, or personal safety, et al.
In response to Ray Pina:
What you’re saying is plain silly. If a girl WILLING COMES TO US to learn how to fight, we will give her what she wants. We dont care what you are, as long as you want to learn. Thats like saying “You shouldnt spar this person because they are at a disadvantage to you!”
I know girls that are built better than guys. I would lightly tap him, and he would fall to the ground (hes a WC guy 
). The girls took better hits than him.
To say that I shouldnt hit girls in a controlled situation is silly. Why are they paying to learn martial arts if they dont get to test it in an active situation?
On a lighter note…
There are some scary fat girls at our school…they would destroy her.
Soccer girls. :eek:
Sparring with girls – whatever. Some girls can spar and take and get hit, and some are wuss weenies that can’t. But the same can be said for some guys – some can spar and get hit, and some are wuss weenies and can’t. And some guys are angry guys that if they get hit they go out on all out vendetta. Never met a woman like that yet.
Anyways, the thing that a lot of people seem to forget is like an earlier poster said – sparring is not to win or lose. The people who always try to win when they spar generally tend to develop bad habits of only using a couple of techniques. I did that before, and your opponents tend to learn those techniques and use it against you. Ouch.
As for the fat thing, a fat sensei / sifu / coach usually tends to mean they are in the part of their life where they aren’t in as good of shape and can’t function as well anymore. But that isn’t always true. Fatness is no true test of skill, unless they’re too fat to move well. There are fat people that can beat the stuffing out of people, especially those skinny waifs with no body mass.
So don’t diss people just because they’re fat. I used to do that, but I’ve met a lot of good, fat martial artists. That being said, I’ve also run into fat lardasses who get winded after about 30 seconds of sparring. But then again, I’ve run into musclebound guys who get winded after 30 seconds of sparring too. And skinny waifs who get winded after 30 seconds of sparring.
So maybe don’t judge a book by their cover. Unless they’re really fat you REALLY don’t want them landing on you in grappling. OUCH.
Heh, you’ve never sparred my sister & ****ed her off. I like to pop her a good one right in the face early on so she starts dolin’ out full force full speed from the get go :
:
And hey, those martial arts instructors aren’t fat, they’re just filled out with chi!
I’m just trying to paint another picture. Open up discussion.
Of course there are girls out there that are tougher than some guys … but even a 160lbs man will have a hell of a time against a 270lbs man… now how about a 150lbs girl?
Sure, she comes to you and pays you so you train her. But in the big scheme of things, are you helping her or hurting her by training her to kick a huge man in the balls? Will that big street thug go down? What will follow?
If she really wants to learn self defense and its not about the money, you’d get a BOB bag and train her with mace and evassive tactics. Maybe teach her how to use a knife or a gun if she’s really serious. This will help her. Training her to think she can go toe to toe with a man is dangerous — even if she can with some members of your club.
When it comes to control, you need mental control, self control. But when you shoot the gun you aim and shoot and let the bullet go. Pulling your strikes – because that’s what you’re mistakingly calling control – can be dangerous for you. We tend to be normal people. It’s not in us to be vicsious. But when it comes to throwing the strike you need to reinforce the idea of wanting to bask someone’s head in, not pull the strike and land lightly if at all.
I’m not talking about trainers who train fighters and they take it lighter (but still landing) to prevent injury for an upcoming fight. I’m talking about ALWAYS sparring light and thinking you’re fueling the fire that you will need in a real altercation.
These two subjects are related. If anyone has a hot female student I’d be happy to come show my point. Let me hit her good, and if she goes down, hit her again real good and pin her and cop a nice feel… doesn’t sound pleasant, but this is the reality I’m talking about.
Think about it.
no but real endomorphic structure does not include fat. Endomorhps by nature are “overweight” because they typically have a heavier skeletal structure and more muscle mass around the soft fleshy parts like the stomach. Someone who is fat is not necessarily endomorphic and to be endomorphic doesn’t mean your fat.
Maybe Ray and Willow Sword should exchange phone numbers, then they can talk about what women are really supposed tobe doing 
yeah, anaerobic/aerobic capacity really isn’t dependent on how much muscle you have or lack.
…
I don’t disagree. I can’t count the number of people I’ve met who claim they are overweight because they are merely “big boned-ed”
that’s exactly what I’m talking about! 
I certainly don’t want to tell anyone – male or female – what they should or shouldn’t do.
I just think it can be dangerous for your typical young lady – and Red – to get it into their heads that they can trully fight with a crazed or well trained man. Teaching them to do so is somewhat irresponsible.
You wouldn’t train an unarmed soldier to storm a fortification – he is under-armed, not equipded. To train a little girl – or Red – to stomp on a man’s toes or kick him in the balls or poke his eyes is of the same thing … not to mention to train them to trade blows.
That’s all I’m saying. When I live with a woman, I help out as an equal with chores. When a big angry man knocks on the door at 3:00 a.m., who should go answer?
that’s not what you said. this is what you said:
You shouldn’t spar with girls. You either don’t hit them and wind up getting hurt or looking bad or you do hit them and then you just hit a girl. There are plenty of guys to play with.
Refusing to spar with a woman because she’s a woman and telling her not to attack a crazed man or two completely different things. We’re talking about sparring, not self defense here Ray and you disaprove of sparring with women, don’t try to make it into a self defense thing. Or is this like the I want to fight but I won’t fight thing?
Red, think before you type… why do you think I don’t like to spar with girls?
It’s masturbation! You can’t hit them for real, with true power, so you just wind up being a punching bag. It’s not good for them and its not good for me. If they want to really fight they need to find another girl or find a guy who doesn’t mind unloading on a girl with full power … I do mind. Why would I punch a girl when I can be fighting guys and not holding back and really pushing myself.
This is not to say it’s “bad” or “wrong” to light spar with a girl. I just said why I don’t think it’s a favorable practice for everyone involved.
But Red, if you want to go spar a bunch of girls in preparation for our fight I highly incourage it.