balancing martial studies with the rest of our lives

Wai Jia: The Kung Fu Forum Kung Fu Forum
1

i’m curious to know how each of you balances your martial studies with everything else in life – your wife/husband/chum, your kids, your job, your other hobbies, etc.

this has been a personal issue with me because i started a new relationship a month ago. she lives in texas, i live in washington state, and finding time can be difficult.

i guess it might be easiest if we kinda gave a profile of our days or our week, and said little tips. i’m up at 6 every weekday morning to work out for a bit, then get cleaned up for work. after work, i go to class to study or teach until 9:45 m/w or 8 t/th. from there on out, it’s time talking to my girlfriend or time with my roomies, read, etc., then bed to start over. weekends are decent, as i work out whenever i get up saturday. sunday is my slack day – i don’t work out and i eat whatever the heck i want.

anyhoo, i have very little free time and that’s with my girlfriend 2400 miles away, no kids or pets to worry about and a generally simple life. i’m kinda concerned how things will pan out when i do start having kids, and i’d like to know how each of you balances your life and your martial arts, especially those of you with kids.

thanks!

-dave

2

Well I don’t have much of a life so it’s easy for me. I usually head straight home after work and practice, after practice then I have dinner. My girlfriend is involved in M.A’a also so when we get together on the weekends we reserve 2hr’s on sunday to practice our Kung Fu unless she has alot of homework or studying to do she’ll practice for about 30 min and I’ll keepr practicing. I find it’s best for me to set up a scheduled to stick to that way I don’t keep putting it off.

3

it’s rough man.

i work monday, wendsday, friday 1pm til 9pm and tuesdays and thursdays 9-5. it’s a real ***** cause i got class tuesdays and thursdays so i never get home before 9:30 on the weekdays. what i was doing for a while was working out as soon as i got home m,w, f until about 11pm then i would spend an hour with adora, eat dinner, be too pumped to get right to bed, get about 4 hours sleep and wake up at 8am the next day exhausted for both work and class. tuesdays and thursdays i would be able to spend more time with adora after class, but i’d end up staying up way too late after she went to bed (like 6am late) and then wake up around 11 the following day. i’d spend some time with her, get showered, and then go off to work. i have always had lots of time with her on weekends, but i hated not seeing allot of her during the week and always being completely exhausted.

recently i have finally managed to start waking up early on the days i work late. so i get up around 9am to work out, spend some time with adora, go to work, and then have from 9 - 12 with her when i got home. this has also let me get to bed earlier so im not so tired on tuesdays and thursdays. this works allot better but i still only get 3 or so hours of time with adora on the weekdays. only about an hour and a half is quality time as you still have to eat, do dishes, laundry, etc.

the best advice i could give you is don’t ever move in with a woman. living with a woman is like haveing a screwdriver driven into your crotch at all times. a kid is the best thing that will ever happen to you, but they definately make life allot harder if you have other goals you are trying to acomplish as well. just have children by accident and play it by ear like everyone else.

4

“the best advice i could give you is don’t ever move in with a woman. living with a woman is like haveing a screwdriver driven into your crotch at all times.”

Bwahahahahaha!!! Yes. I decided not move in with a women or get married after watching allot of Married with children then watching my family and seeing the same thing!

5

Week days (non training: Mon. Wed. Thurs.)

Up at 8:00 a.m. (I shower before bed).

9-5: work

6:30: dinner with my girlfriend.

7-8: Simpsons and Sienfeld.

8-9: work on the latest while my girl chills out

9-11:30. Shower, chill out with friends, whatever, Seinfeld at 11:00 then bed.

Tues: Same as above till 6:30.

6:30 to 8: 1 train, 2 subways and a nice walk to class.

8-11: class

11:50 to 1: repeat process home.

1:30 bed.

On friday, I’ll stay up till 5 writing, working on my book.

SATURDAY!!!

Wake up at 11:00 or so.

Breakfast.
Have a few friends over to chi sau or bang around for a few hours (no sharing technology, just ideas, thoughts).

Chill with my girl, friends, whatever.

Dinner, movie, hang out, whatever.

Midnight, write till 5:00 a.m.

Sundays are like Sat. but no writing at night, put the brain on ice for work the next day.

In the summer, maybe miss a class or two when the waves are good and I want to surf. Surf before and after work.

6

work mon thru fri 8:30 - 5:30, or something like that. Train mon, wed, thurs and fri. sun shou and traditional mon and fri, taditional only on thurs and sun shou only on wed. but this schedule will change after next month. I’m late for work just about everyday because I can’t get out of bed sometimes and while i’m here, i’m gettin tips from this board and other site on the net. so i’m not really gettin much work done.

I really need to work out more at home with an actual work out schedule. Right now I just do what I feel and when I feel. I moght just get up and do forms during comercials or work on combinations while food is cooking, but I don’t have a set at home work out.

I would like to have KF be my lifestyle instead of fitting it into my life. One of these days KF will be paying my bills but until then it 9 - 5. U guys still in college, or going, think about that when choosing a major.

I’m definitly gonna have to find me a MA female, 'cause these regular broads just don’t get it…

7

On weekdays I work 8:30-5:30 and train 6-8:30. I relax on the weekends.

I’ve been planning my wedding lately, which is like a part time job, so I’ve been pretty busy.

My fiance is very supportive of my training, and it’s hard sometimes not to go home to her right after work. We don’t get to eat dinner until after 10 most nights (I’m the chef).

Just keep a postive attitude as much as you can and enjoy the full plate life has served you :).

8

shaolinboxer

thanks for the tips. yeah, it is quite nice having a good job (i work for the university i graduated from), a wonderful martial art and family, and a grand girlfriend. all are understanding of each other, and that’s why things are working well. the biggest problems i’m having are those that deal with feeling that i’m not giving enough time to my girlfriend. we’re in that new and novel stage and sometimes she’s all i can think about. usually, when i 2qw single, i woke up thinking about wing tsun and fell asleep thinking about wing tsun. not really the case anymore. of course, there’s also the fact that she’s just as busy as i am.

anyhoo, yeah, i consider myself quite blessed in my current situation. i just sometimes worry that i’m not giving back the same kind of happiness to individual things that i receive from them.

9

Balancing it all is ROUGH

These days it seems I will sleep when I’m dead… :smiley:

Mon - Fri
Up at 5:30am, out the door for work by 6:30. Home by 5:30. Out the door again by 6:00 to get Kung Fu. It takes me an hour to get there so I train from about 7 (depending on traffic) to about 10:00, Home by 11, in bed by 12 to start ALL over again (dinner is usually eaten in the Car on the way to the school).

Weekends - train when I get up (if I’m not too tired) but since I have no life during the week - I run my errands and have a social life and all that neeto stuff.

It is REALLY tough. Usually by Friday I am so tired I have trouble seeing straight (Thank god for Caffeine).:smiley: :smiley:

10

Like martial arts, relationships are about quality more than quantity (IMO).

It is natural not to think about kung fu all of the time once you are in a good relationship (since all of that kung fu fantasising was filling the gap now filled by your girlfriend).

Good luck :)!

11

:slight_smile:

Kung Fu practice brings balance to the rest of my life.

My life would be turmoil without the Kung Fu that I have been taught.

The previous martial arts I studied have no depth in comparison to the Chinese martial arts I have been taught in this respect.

Not they they were not worthwhile, they were and also brought a lot to my life.

However, I was given more than martial arts in Chinese martial arts training. With each passing day I realize how little I know.
The balance in work, leisure, family activity and social activity is drawn from Kung Fu training.

I do not need to find a place for it to fit.

peace

12

Hi.

Here is my Week:

I tend to confine my training to weekends.

During the Week both me and my Wife work, so in the evenings we share the Housework.
After Supper I hang the washing up,she does the dishes, etc.

Head to work at 07:00am and get back anytime between 18:30 ~ 02:00

Trying to cram 30 minutes in here and there as time allowes.

My Kwoon only has classes on Saturday afternoons.
I go for the early Lesson my Wife takes the later Lesson, in between lessons we do a Child handover.
On Sunday mornings I train with fellow students in the Park, wile my Wife does the House cleaning(she prefers me gone).

Normally she and the little one join us at the park later on and she also does a bit of training.
After training the whole Family takes a stroll and does some shopping on the way back home.
Other Hobbies get fitted in during the week and evenings.

Yep, I do less training than most of you guys. But my Priorities are as follows:
Family,
Work,
Martial Arts.
I can replae my Job and Martial Arts training a lot easire than my Familiy.

Plus, my Family will support me even if I don’t have MA or a Job.

But only a Job or MA or even both, make for a lonely life.

BTW, this way I also have less stress to train and therefor am more relaxed during training and actually advance faster.

Just some thoughts.

13

I’m always practicing throughout the day, so I rarely ever feel a need to set aside time for training.

When I get free time, I sometimes practice so intensely that I burn myself out and am forced to take a nap.

The way I see it, my activities and even life revolve around my kung fu training.

14

Well the ideal situation is of course having a career that evolves around MA or sports.

I’ve found actually the opposite i hvae way too much time on my hands, i wish i could train all 5 days but there is only class 3 times a week. I’ve been thinking about taking up judo as well (since it aligns perfectly with my TKD class, so i would have 5 days a week practice and weekends optional), but i cant really cuz i’ve already told my employer (i work part time) that tuesdays and thursdays are my days off i’ll work any other day.

Btw since someone mentioned girlfriends, i’m not involved as it is but i was with my last girlfriend for 6 months, and it started out great in part because at the time she was real busy in HER training, it was not MA it was Jazz Ballet but her schedual was even more busy then mine, but hey i know how i feel about practice and dont expect her to skip practice just ebcause i feel like meeting and at first it wasnt like that either with her. But then she started loosing interest and getting more demanding on time etc etc. So i’d say having a girlfriend that also has a busy workout schedual (or any other hobby) helps, then she can most likely understand the passion you have for what you do and not try to make yuo choose between her and MA. Only downside to this is of course with 2 packed scheduals and them of course not being in synch we didnt have a lot of time to ourselves, but it like someone said earlier it’s quality over quantity.

I’ve thought about work and training, it doesnt really effect me now but it will in the future, i think i’d just like a stationary 9-5 job at a pretty high level company, those usually have built in gyms where people can go and pretty loose scheduals (or so i hear these places do not exist in Iceland :slight_smile: (too small of a market)).

15

I am usually in the ofice from 9-5 sometimes later. working with something as hectic and fast paced as the web, those hours can vary greatly. I try to get in an hour of training at work (my job is one like Qeysus mentioned, with a huge gym) there is a “billy bob” (the torso bag) and a few other bags, in addition to jump ropes and plenty of exercise equipment. At work I either lift and jump rope, or lift and work the bag. At home I try to get in at least another 2 hours. that two hours consists of shadowboxing, forms, drills and calisthenics. The wife is usually not at home, and my kid either watched tv or tries to mimic me, so it’s no problem.

A tip - try to work out whenever you can. I try to do it all at once, but if you can’t, then do a little here and there. Do you have a favorite tv show? train while you’re watching it. There’s always time :slight_smile:

16

Sevenstar.

I agree with you do a certain Degree.

Just wish my Apartment was big enough to allow me to exercise in front of the TV.

In Japan we are VERY restricted on available space. :frowning:

Seeya.

17

Yeah i’m hopefully getting into some IT stuff as wel SevenStar, might be getting a 50% job at a gaming company soon, it’s nothing major but should look nice on a resumé.

Any suggestions as to what i should get into? (in college) there are soooo many courses, Computer science, computer engineering, software engineering, IT, bla bla bla bla. I have no idea raelly :slight_smile: Been thinking about Computer Science in Oslo Uni, Everyone is telling me to get into engineering of some sort but i’m not sure i could handle the math.

18

Don’t do it.

qeySuS.

Don’t get into IT, been there now 16yrs.

Listen to me, don’t do it.

We now return you to your scheduled programming.

19

THere are no other interests i have in life, there’s MA and there’s computers. And i’m not going to learn MA in college so .. :slight_smile:

20

if I had it to do over I would go sports medicine, or something like that, but than again I wasn’t doing MA at the time. What’s wrong with IT. All I see them doing is sitting around all day…